Tazzy tree fern update...

Day 11.....

...still a stump.

Have decided to call it Bernard.

Will post a photo of Bernard (pronounced English way... Burr-nudd) when Lelly gives me the gen on how the flip to do it. I'm sure you are waiting with baited blithering breath (yeah right)...

Blithers in the garden

Having spied

Lecram's

latest post regarding plots and green stuff, I felt duty bound to fess up my latest interest/ obsession.

Since a fortnight hencewise ago, I have a little oasis in the centre of Londinium Pollutium, England. Where before there was nothing but dandelions, snail trails and dog poo, there now is, (wot them on telly like to term) "an outside ambience".

Initially I spent a whole weekend doing manly tasks like digging, scraping and moving bags of rubble in order to create the bare bones of the garden. (Fortunately this didnt turn out to be literally bare bones like what happened to neighbour on the left who last weekend dug up the previous owners dog in a spell of frantic gardening. Too scared to look too far into the bin bag and cushions that held the dog bones, or handle it for too long, she forewent the ceremonial re-burial and shoved it in the wheely bin.) Anyway, once the foundation had been created, I popped into a garden centre for a couple of bags of seeds to get me started and managed to fill the trolley withing about 15 minutes with £160 worth of plants! Eeeek!

Star of the show is my Tazmanian tree fern, which cost me £70 and resembles a brown furry stump... but a stump that holds the promise of gently unfurling soft fern leaves in the coming days....

....Day 3 and its still a stump. Faithfully moistened daily as instructed on dangling lable...no pressure then... In fact I seem to water the bloody garden all the blithering time, even if it has tittled with rain all day. I think I am obsessed - I'm often to be found crunching up and down the slate chipping path watching over my various fledgelings..... I think its love......

Wild aligators and Grade 4 Pianoforte....

Lelly

, my good friend, has helped me clamber back into blogland... but only just. I have spent far too long trying to regain control of my profile and it has felt like trying to tame a wild aligator by wrestling it into submission.

It's official, I am stupid - not even my 3 A'levels, BSC degree, cycling proficiency, 100metres breaststroke certificate and Grade 4 Pianoforte can save me now.

Any road up, if anyone has managed to keep up with my change of blogname and username and display name, I have abandoned Mince_pie_in_the_eye for a more onomatopoeic one. I hope it is politely descriptive of my current feeling towards blogs and blogville. I no longer feel like a mince pie, in the eye or otherwise. You can stick mince pies in a pastry case and glaze it for all I care.

While all this wrestling was going on, my venetian blind fell down all over my desk. Judging by the mushroom cloud that followed, I think it had been groaning under the weight of dust for quite sime time and finally threw itself at me as a cry for help. As a result, I am squinting for England which is likely to lead to a wrinkled forehead and a requirement for surgery by the time I am 40.

Grumbling aside, I thought bloggers in my immediate circle, woudl like to know about a BBC competition for comedy writing. Top UK comedy writers have half written a sitcom and you are invited to finish it. I guess it may lead to a top writing job for the BBC, or at the very least it woud be a real laugh to have a go at. I wondered if my dear and hysterically funny chum Lelly would like to co-write something? I suspect its more difficult than one might think.... I'm sure our American friend would be able to confirm.....

OK, folks, I'm off to get the blind fixed.. or shall I get surgery?.....erm......

Lord of the Mince pies...the return to Blog....

Well, friends. I gave up on Mince pie in the eye as I lost the plot on how to get in and out of it. I will probably lose it with this too so please expect a different name every time I post.

I wont go on, as I may lose it all again.